This is something I’ve really struggled to talk about since not many people believe it.
I’ve always been an energy-sensitive person. Maybe I empathize too much but since I was little, I’ve always seen the world in a different color.
When it comes to energy, I physically feel the weight of others emotions. Sometimes it makes my toes curl, other times I feel it in my fingers. I can tell when others are anxious but other cases, my mood is impacted often by energy around me.
I’ve been to several Buddhist temples in Japan and I know that Hinduism is very closely based on Buddhism, I didn’t expect to have a different experience like I did here.
Upon arriving at this Hindu temple, I was taken aback by the intricacy of the architecture and the serenity of the ambiance. Even the fountain was just as complex as the exterior.
However, this was all a facade.
After setting our belongings aside and taking our shoes off, we pushed past the doors that were embellished with baroque details only to find ourselves entering a completely different realm. The entire room was painted white and the floor was decorated with sleek marble. The ceilings were tall and held up by meticulously engraved columns that were encased in glass.
I slowly made my way through the room and a man welcomed me with so much enthusiasm. Women held their folded hands to their foreheads while kneeling in front of the statues and men were laying their bodies across the foyer.
I approached the center altar that presented statues of the deities and was suddenly overwhelmed with an energy I’ve never felt before. I kept pushing my thumb against my fingers, almost like I was trying to make it stop.
I felt washed over in so much pure goodness that I started crying.
But it wasn’t because I was sad.
In fact, I found tranquility and euphoria. I found peace at mind.
It was the most beautiful experience I’ve ever had that I could hardly put into words.
My roommate later explained that the mandir was a home where people and gods can meet and the point of going was to find peace at mind.
I think the most wondrous thing about this temple was that I was accepted. I wasn’t seen as a fashion blogger, as an Asian, as a dancer, etc. I wasn’t seen for my surface qualities, for the things that I did or the things I attributed myself to.
I was seen as a person.
After being looked at as being so many different stereotypes and after being seen in various lights, it felt as if I started anew to be seen as just a being.
Coat via Forever 21 / High waisted leggings via H&M / Shoes via Nike
Photography by Justin Quebral